Category Archives: Apologetics

What does it mean to be nice anyway?

If you read a variety of blogs, you may have heard the news last week that a prominent atheist blogger dropped the bombshell that she was beginning the conversion process to Christianity. And not just any branch of Christianity… Catholicism.

Dun Dun DAH!

The news was met by a series of reactions:

1. Yay and Welcome! (from Catholics and some Christians)

2. Wow. O_0. (from other Christians and some atheists)

3. WTF is wrong with you?! Are you sick in the head?! (from other atheists)

That second reaction could be subdivided into another group though:

2a. Wow. So, yeah, that’s cool, but why CATHOLICISM? (And then they’d go on to list the reasons why the Catholic Church is bad… from the Crusades to picking on the LCWR.)

Leah is doing a fine enough job explaining her position and change of heart on her blog and I welcome you to read about it there, but I want to talk a bit about why I think people take such an issue with Catholicism specifically.

For the commenters who were OK with her decision to convert, many of them asked her why she didn’t consider Unitariansim, or a Congregational Church or Judaism, or Buddism, or any other religion that was more welcoming, all encompassing, accepting, etc.  In their eyes, Catholicism is the religion of NO:

-No women priests.

-No abortion.

-No birth control

-No divorce

-No sex w/o marriage

-No missing Mass

-No Same Sex Marriage (Leah self-identifies as bisexual and has admitted that this teaching is pretty challenging)

It basically comes down to this, in the eyes of some: Catholics are not nice, so why would an intelligent woman choose to become Catholic?

But, if you think about it… As Christians we are not called to be nice. We are called to be loving, but being loving is not the same as being nice. I love my kids more than anything, but they will tell you… there are times when mama and daddy are NOT nice.

Let’s look at it from a parenting point of view. Think about when you were a kid, usually everyone else’s parents were nicer than yours for some reason or another. And as a kid, nice usually means… permissive. The nice parents let their kids do more things than yours did, they bought their kids more stuff than yours did, the nice parents usually had fewer rules and were more laissez-faire, the nice parents were cool and well… nice.

We may want nice parents, but do we need nice parents?

Yes, the Catholic Church has rules but those rules allow us freedom. It sounds so contradictory (and maybe a little “1984″) but rules keep you safe. Speed Limits keep us safe on the freeways and streets, traffic lights keep us safe as pedestrians and drivers, laws keep us (relatively) safe from each other (and the government,) but when you boil it down… they are all forms of rules.

One of the reasons Leah cites for moving from atheism to theism was the concept of Moral Law and one of the things that Catholicism surely lacks is this idea of Moral Relativism… you know, the thought that everything is OK as long as it works for you, so why would it be so surprising to begin exploring true Catholicism and not media Catholicism?

God only knows what Leah will find on her journey toward Rome. I believe that God tailors each convert’s or revert’s or seeker’s journey to what they need to hear… not what they want to hear. The question is, will ears be opened to listening?

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What do you think? Are being loving and nice the same thing? Are Christians called to be nice? What does nice mean?

Don’t forget to enter into my latest Giveaway! The Giveaway is open to U.S. Residents only (sorry!) and will remain open until midnight (PST) June 30. The winner will be contacted within 48 hours of the giveaway end and will have 48 hours to reply before a new winner is chosen!

 

 

 

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I’m in the Garage, but I’m not a Car!

A friend on FB sent me the link to a blog post that she found. The blogger is a mom, like me, and a Catholic, like me. She was writing about her recent visit to Mass in which she mistakenly said “And Also with You,” rather than “And With Your Spirit.”

If you’ve been to Mass since Advent 2011, you will have noticed the changes in the translation. Even if you are a weekly (or more frequent) Mass goer, you probably still mess it up. Personally, I tend to miss the “It is Right and Just,” part and the little parts in the Nicene Creed. The blogger was clear in that she and her family do not attend Mass all that often and even remarked that, in her mind, it was not an essential part of being Catholic or Christian. She used the  saying, “Going to Church no more makes you a “good” Catholic as standing in the garage makes you a car.”

I know many Catholics and Christians who feel that way too. What’s the point of going to Mass or Service? After all, you can be a good Christian by following the ways of Christ and not by spending hours on a Sunday morning, right?

I will not speak for other Christians, but I will say that as Catholics, at LEAST weekly Mass attendance is a must. In fact, if you miss Mass for reasons other than illness or taking care of other people, say a parent or child… someone dependent on you, you have put yourself in a state of Mortal Sin. To some this is harsh… to put missing Mass in the same category as “soul-killing” as murder or adultery, but in the eyes of the Church, by missing Mass on purpose, you have chosen to separate yourself from the community of the faithful, on purpose. (And for my Latin/ Word origin nerds: “ex-”= outside… so, if one is excommunicated… where are they, WRT church community?)

Why are we called to attend Mass?

Community. A friend once said to me “A Christian cannot live in isolation.” We can pray in solitude, but we are called to worship in communion. In attending Mass, you have the chance of meeting and getting to know other faithful Catholics and depending on your Parish, getting to know the people of your neighborhood and community. Mass isn’t just about Coffee and Donuts, but you have to admit, that’s where you get fellowship.

Scripture. Oftentimes, Catholics are accused of not knowing the Bible. This is because there are rarely Bibles in the pews at a Catholic Church and if you don’t have Bibles in Church, how can you know the Bible, right? While we may not have Bibles in the pews, we do have Missals which have the readings for the Mass in them. The readings are typically first from the Old Testiment, then a Psalm, then a New Testimant and finally a Gospel reading. The readings are organized so that over the course of  THREE years, the entire Bible is proclaimed from the Ambo. Also, think about the teachings Jesus did in the Bible. What it ever just Jesus talking to himself? No, it was Jesus before a crowd of people.

Make it Holy. Depending on your faith tradition, the 3rd or 4th commandment is to Remember the Sabbath Day and to keep it Holy. The book of Exodus goes into great detail about what you should and should not do on the seventh day. But that is so old-fashioned! Maybe that worked in Bible times, but things have changed. We are an “on the go” people; most of us don’t get enough sleep at night, nor do some have the time to cook a meal for the family. Why in the world would we take a few hours out of our lives to sit and be still? We have soccer games and picnics and parties and shopping to get done. God understands… right? (The commandments also say to not have any other gods before him. Just sayin’.)

The Eucharist. We attend the Mass not to be entertained, not to be kept occupied, not because we have to. We attend Mass to prepare ourselves to receive the Body and Blood of Jesus. In receiving Christ within us, we depart the Mass not just Catholics, but as living breathing tabernacles… carrying Christ into our lives. Just as physical tabernacles are varied, so are the tabernacles that leave your Catholic Church every day, after Mass, but they all serve one purpose. To honor and protect the Christ.

For our family, Mass is part of our week. It is no different from library day or swim lessons, or playdates or anything else that we do week to week. We make it a priority to be there on Sunday morning and if we know we can’t make it on Sunday… we are there Saturday night. Why? Because for our family, God is more important than the library or swim or shopping or anything else that would keep us from worshipping him in a community of other Catholics.

But that’s just us.

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From now on Sin No More.

If you ever want to get into a pissing contest with another Christian or Agnostic or Atheist, bring up the Adulterous Woman. Most of this have heard this one from the Gospel of John.

(The paraphrasing is mine, but you can read the Word for yourself in John 8)

Jesus is in the middle of teaching a lesson when the Pharasees bring along a woman who was caught in adultery. According to Mosaic law, the woman was to be stoned, no question  about it. But Jesus, seeing this as the ultimate teaching moment, thinks a bit and starts to write in the sand. After a bit, He stands up and says, “Tell you what. The person here who is without Sin, let them throw the first stone at her.” The angry crowd slowly walks away, one by one, leaving only Jesus and the woman. The woman is very grateful to Jesus for saving her life. Jesus then asks her, “So… where’d they go? Did no one condemn you?” She says, “No, they all left.” Jesus replies, “I don’t condemn you either.”

Now, some people like to stop right there especially when talking about the forgiving nature of Jesus and as an extension, Christians (and yes, I am considering Catholics among Christians because we are.) To some, this account is basically carte blanche for people to do what they want to do, because, after all, with Grace and being washed in the Lamb’s Blood comes forgiveness. In the eyes of some, our sinful actions are OK, because Jesus forgave the adulterous woman. He said that it was OK, and that He didn’t condemn her!

But that’s not where He stops. Jesus goes on to say:

From now on, SIN NO MORE.

Yes, Jesus will forgive our sins if we ask for said forgiveness. If you are Catholic, that means heading to reconciliation. If you are non-Catholic, it means something else depending on your faith tradition. But Jesus also tells us not to do it again.

We want to have this idea that Jesus was all love and happy and unicorns and butterflies, but we need to realize that Jesus had very black and white views. Yes there were things that were wrong. Selling stuff in the temple? Bad. (So bad that he physically ejected the sellers!) Adultery? Bad. Divorce? Bad.  (see verses 17 and 18) More thoughts on Divorce.  Still Bad. (The previous link is often cited as Jesus’s condemnation against homosexuality. I’m not a theologian and I’m not going to play one on the Internet.)

So, yes, in the eyes of Jesus there are right choices and there are wrong choices. If you decide to make a wrong choice, know that you will be forgiven if you are contrite and ask for  forgiveness. But then we are told, like any parent to a child, Don’t do it again.*
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*Now, you know and I know that we are all going to screw up. You know why? Because we are far from perfect and honestly, sin is easier than living a righteous life. (You know, the road to Hell is straight and wide?) So what happens when we screw up? We ask for forgiveness again. Now, you may be wondering… what if I plan to do something that I KNOW is wrong. Is it wrong for me to do it, knowing that I will be forgiven, if I just ask for it? Well, yeah that’s wrong. You are supposing that God will forgive you. (It’s the sin of “presupposition.” How would you feel, as a parent, if your kid came up to you and said, “Mom/Dad, I took $100 from your wallet but it’s all good because I know that you’ll forgive me.” We would all respond to that differently, you don’t know how I’d respond, I don’t know how you’d respond and we sure as hell don’t know how God responds. It’s almost enough to make you go all scrupulous.

 

 

 

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