Today’s Guest Post was written by Kim B-G, long time CCM reader and conversationalist!
If you’re active on social media at all, you’re likely now quite aware of your friends’ political views and their thoughts on the outcome of the presidential election. Because I have friends that run the gauntlet of the political spectrum, I expected to see anything from elation and relief to disappointment and even concern about the direction our country is headed, but I was not prepared for the level of hate-filled language toward the two mainstream candidates and parties. I’ve seen anything from “I hate Romney” to “Libtards” groups (yes, libtards…let’s insult two groups of people at once, eh?). This is why our country is so divided right now–not because of disagreement itself but because of some sort of deep-rooted disdain people hold for those with whom they disagree.
This animosity distracts us from coming up with good, comprehensive policies when we assume a person we disagree with is ill-intended. Beyond politics, it’s rampant in our personal relationships, workplaces, and day-to-day interactions with people–that we assume the worst in others because they do something we don’t like. We assume that children are spiting us, our partners are selfish, or our bosses just want to make our life miserable. Take a simple example of when you get cut off in traffic. Do you assume that person is a complete ass who thinks their life is more important than yours? Or is your first thought that perhaps they have a family emergency they are rushing to, or they are going to be late for work and have a big presentation to give that their job depends on? We’ll never know why that person cut us off, so why not give them the benefit of the doubt when we have no proof to the contrary?
When we assume the worst in people, we all lose. This doesn’t mean that there isn’t value in disagreement or having a heated debate on controversial issues or that we need to take a “sunshine and rainbows” approach to politics. However, keeping in mind that very few people are so self-centered and cruel that they wish our lives to be miserable can go a long way in creating a civil debate. Understanding—truly understanding—where another person is coming from can be incredibly enlightening. It allows us to consider other viewpoints we perhaps hadn’t thought of before. It allows us to see them as a person rather than “the enemy”. It allows us to realize that everyone wants our country and its citizens to thrive—we just have different thoughts on how to achieve that.
I love passionate people, and it is possible to maintain that energy without resorting to attacks. We need to get away from thinking that “cooperation” means “weakness” or leads to watered-down policy. Let’s have empathy and respect rather than aggression and suspicion as our default, and let’s set a better example for the next generation.
http://tinybuddha.com/blog/do-happy-assume-the-best/
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